I'm gonna live my life to the max that I can.

The Creator

Estelle.
160509, Joshua♥

I knew it just that I kept quiet, I'm not dumb, I'm just acting dumb, I'm not as stupid as anyone can think of, I've got brain.
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IMAGES:images Blog contents copyright © 2009-2009

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

This realistic world is harsh enough to kill me.
I would rather end all my pain.

Ever since you told me that, I've been hurt. Hais. I want to be honest.

Sorry, people, Mind me, I'm not gonna be the estelle that you all see anymore.

Take it as I didn't come into all of your life's.

I'm waiting for tonight, just to breakdown.

I'm waiting for tonight, just to tell the truth.

To tell myself, I'm going to die! I'm very very tired.

I do not need your encouragements anymore.

I fall and I'm not gonna stand up.

Give me some time.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Sorry, people, I'll relink and reply tags once I'm free,
just doing a quick update!

Hey, Readers! I'm back. After a long emotional and sick day.
It start off well in the morning, but right after recess,
My whole mood change. Broke down during MT lesson.
Thanks, Sweetie, Hengyean and Dayna'Bestfriend, for blessing me during RECESS!

No matter how much I tell myself, I got to smile just for the sake of those who cared, halfway through, I'll still feel discouraged.

After school, I got very emotional, I had a fever.
Asshole kids, Pour bottles of water on me, FREEZING COLD.
Did I tell you it's ice water?

Sit at the staircase, freezing like what?
Damn cold, Brrrrr.
My eyes are sore, am I a stranger to you people?
I'm refering to EVERYONE SINGLE ONE OF YOU.

Monday, February 8, 2010

I don't give a DAMN to you.
Tyvm.

This post will be full of anger and fustration!
Trust me.

Okay, whatever~
Just now, I was using the computer, just to charge and download my MP4 player.
Thus, my mum came to my room, scoldscoldscold, I don't give a damn.
I told her, LATER. In a very polite way, yet she's being so unreasonable, she said, NOW! Shingz, whatever. She forced me to say get out of my room, as I wanted to study. She keep scoldscoldscold.

Hey, you stupid ass.
Stop ripping things in my blog(s), can?! I don't give a fucking damn to you.
Trying to be like me?! Scram off, BITCH, SLUT, WHORE, CHICKENASSES! I hate you, even the rest do, you think I care? Stop being a flirt, can anot?! Shitz you.

I seriiously feel very discouraged now. Right at this moment, I'm telling myself, DON'T GIVE UP. Smile. Estelle, smile!
But actually, inside me, My heart is dead, halfway giving up.
"Estelle, just give up, you know it's going to be tough, so give up girl!"
Argh!

Hais. Tell me something good at least.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Sunday, Afternoon, 1.45pm.

Hello, readers! Phew, after a short bathe, felt refreshed.

Going to study later on, first and formals, I got to finish up piles of WORKshits.

Nice right? I know, ain't any better.

Okay, whatever~ I'm just swaying my time away for now.

Going for a jog later n the evening, aftermath, should be heading to JP and buy some stuff with Mum.

I want a new Heartshape necklace! Haha! :D

I really wanna say sorry to PearllynnPotz.

We drifted alot after school started, and I wanna say a sincere sorry to you.

Let's meet up soon, alright? :)

Anyway, I'm telling myself and forcing myself to move on in life.

I got to continue to run this human race, I'm going at my own pace.

If I cannot catch up with my work, I'll honestly ask teacher.

Thanks, Jialin, Cassandra, Maybelene, Yixuan, Jeremy, Ryan, Tongwai, Khairul, and alot more people. Especially 2e5'10 for encouraging me, believing me, and doing loads of things just to make me get back up on track.

Living by a motto,

I'll live everyday of my life to the fullest, to the max that I can.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

I knew it, just that I kept quiet and didn't tell you.

Had MC for 2 days. Yet I return to school for D-RAMARAMA.
Feels okay, just abit giddy.
Guess what? I'm very self-centered. Nice right?!

Fine, whatever, Shingz.
Okay, I'm feeling exhuasted.
I wanted to head home for a goodnight rest, yet I didn't.
I was feeling very tired, but once I lay down on the mattress.
I started to tear, and a thought came.
"Estelle, give up, just give up, seriously, there's nothing in life to hold on, not even for your career."

It tears me apart when you first said that.
But I anticipated it already.

I couldn't control my emotions, I had no one to turn to at that point of time.
A thought came, do anything that makes you feel alright, I nearly took the knife and stab myself.

Wake up, estelle.
Reality, that's all.
But I don't wanna face it. Hais.

Livejournal back, http://thlovemachine.livejournal.com

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

(Paiseh, Pictures are taken quiet awhile.)

Was it because I owe you my life?

Okay, forget about it. I'm trying to let go of you, girl. Haha!
Okay, enough of crapz. Hmm, Copycat! I hate you, shitz you!
Give jiaobin huh, NB! You bueysong, is it? Things I have, you wanna piece of it, or rather the full share? Fuck you.

You seem innocent, AW. You ain't, sucker! Haha!
Thanks alot to ShervelLim! (L) Had a great chat with her.
Well, thanks to ShutiaoJieh! (L) for her $2! Loves(L)

Went for the healthzone talk today, it was a TOTAL blast!
Well, Had fun though, because of Aisha and the other girls, Haha!
Not even done with a single SHIT of homework huh, Nice.

I broke down just now, and I'm telling myself to hold on yet in my heart, I'm giving up.
I think I'm slowly giving up.
(Inner struggles) FML!
Thanks, Potz for cheering me up, she's the best person you can find whenever you're upset, serious, I'm not lying through my teeth, (I'm not lying!)

Okay, I guess this post is full of shit sentences. Random stuff for the day.
P/s, I skipped a period of MotherTongue today! Yayness!
P/s/s, I'm not done with my homework.
P/s/s/s, I need to charge my MediaPlayer.
P/s/s/s/s, I love ICE water! (Since young)
P/s/s/s/s/s, I love M&M, so rainbow-ish!
P/s/s/s/s/s/s, I hate that girl, don't make me turn it into hatred, I will kill myself.
P/s/s/s/s/s/s/s, Listening to Blahblahblah.
P/s/s/s/s/s/s/s/s, I'm so pissed off at you, girl.

If I know it from the start,
I wouldn't have know ya.

I thought I could trust ya,
but I've been hurt deeply.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Guess ain't feeling any better compare to yesterday.
It went so drastic last night.
I'm starting to lose myself, help me! Please.

I'm losing the whole human race, help me, PLEASE.
I guess I don't need the care from anyone.
I don't deserve to be love, I don't deserve the priviledge of human being.
I deserve to go HELL!

I'm not happy pretending to be alright.
Hatred builds up to killing.
If you all get what I mean, DUDE!
You can don't get what I mean though.
Cycling does makes me go HIGH.
I was cycling and screaming ALL the way, Nice..

Imagine cycling and going HIGH alone. Loner and Pathetic hor?!
I know.
Learning to get high ALONE.

Okay, shall end here.
Hmm, I'm stuck with UNTIL WE BLEED.
Seem so eerie.
And I realised all the tissues that I cried is in my bagpack. (Laughs, but true)

*Applause*
"Best" student of the year to Estelle Teh, ya right.
Crapz, so many random stuff.
Goodbyez!


The Creator Estelle. 160509, Joshua♥ I knew it just that I kept quiet, I'm not dumb, I'm just acting dumb, I'm not as stupid as anyone can think of, I've got brain. Hotmail,Twitter,Tumblr, Livejournal Twitter Follow Me! LET'S TALK Links W466 1E4'09 6A'08 ♥: Cassandra♥ Shervel♥ PearllynnPotz♥ AliciaChiang Menda Aiwen Xinyee JuniorJ Adilah AliciaLeo Amelia Anqi Caiwen Cassandra Chengyun Cheryl Chiengyi Christian Dhacha Dayna Denise Eunice Fiona Gabriel Haziqah Hengyean Hongyu Jasmine Jeremy Jialin Joey Joyce Meiyi Melinda Nadia Nanako Rachel Sajidah Serene Sheena Shichun Shiying Szelin Tinghui Velda Weijie Weiling Yiling Yingxuan Yixuan Ziying Zoe Thank you Layout & css by:kynz gerl IMAGES:images Blog contents copyright © 2009-2009	Wednesday, February 10, 2010 This realistic world is harsh enough to kill me. I would rather end all my pain. Ever since you told me that, I've been hurt. Hais. I want to be honest. Sorry, people, Mind me, I'm not gonna be the estelle that you all see anymore. Take it as I didn't come into all of your life's. I'm waiting for tonight, just to breakdown. I'm waiting for tonight, just to tell the truth. To tell myself, I'm going to die! I'm very very tired. I do not need your encouragements anymore. I fall and I'm not gonna stand up. Give me some time. Tuesday, February 9, 2010 Sorry, people, I'll relink and reply tags once I'm free, just doing a quick update! Hey, Readers! I'm back. After a long emotional and sick day. It start off well in the morning, but right after recess, My whole mood change. Broke down during MT lesson. Thanks, Sweetie, Hengyean and Dayna'Bestfriend, for blessing me during RECESS! No matter how much I tell myself, I got to smile just for the sake of those who cared, halfway through, I'll still feel discouraged. After school, I got very emotional, I had a fever. Asshole kids, Pour bottles of water on me, FREEZING COLD. Did I tell you it's ice water? Sit at the staircase, freezing like what? Damn cold, Brrrrr. My eyes are sore, am I a stranger to you people? I'm refering to EVERYONE SINGLE ONE OF YOU. Monday, February 8, 2010 I don't give a DAMN to you. Tyvm. This post will be full of anger and fustration! Trust me. Okay, whatever~ Just now, I was using the computer, just to charge and download my MP4 player. Thus, my mum came to my room, scoldscoldscold, I don't give a damn. I told her, LATER. In a very polite way, yet she's being so unreasonable, she said, NOW! Shingz, whatever. She forced me to say get out of my room, as I wanted to study. She keep scoldscoldscold. Hey, you stupid ass. Stop ripping things in my blog(s), can?! I don't give a fucking damn to you. Trying to be like me?! Scram off, BITCH, SLUT, WHORE, CHICKENASSES! I hate you, even the rest do, you think I care? Stop being a flirt, can anot?! Shitz you. I seriiously feel very discouraged now. Right at this moment, I'm telling myself, DON'T GIVE UP. Smile. Estelle, smile! But actually, inside me, My heart is dead, halfway giving up. "Estelle, just give up, you know it's going to be tough, so give up girl!" Argh! Hais. Tell me something good at least. Sunday, February 7, 2010 Sunday, Afternoon, 1.45pm. Hello, readers! Phew, after a short bathe, felt refreshed. Going to study later on, first and formals, I got to finish up piles of WORKshits. Nice right? I know, ain't any better. Okay, whatever~ I'm just swaying my time away for now. Going for a jog later n the evening, aftermath, should be heading to JP and buy some stuff with Mum. I want a new Heartshape necklace! Haha! :D I really wanna say sorry to PearllynnPotz. We drifted alot after school started, and I wanna say a sincere sorry to you. Let's meet up soon, alright? :) Anyway, I'm telling myself and forcing myself to move on in life. I got to continue to run this human race, I'm going at my own pace. If I cannot catch up with my work, I'll honestly ask teacher. Thanks, Jialin, Cassandra, Maybelene, Yixuan, Jeremy, Ryan, Tongwai, Khairul, and alot more people. Especially 2e5'10 for encouraging me, believing me, and doing loads of things just to make me get back up on track. Living by a motto, I'll live everyday of my life to the fullest, to the max that I can. Saturday, February 6, 2010 I knew it, just that I kept quiet and didn't tell you. Had MC for 2 days. Yet I return to school for D-RAMARAMA. Feels okay, just abit giddy. Guess what? I'm very self-centered. Nice right?! Fine, whatever, Shingz. Okay, I'm feeling exhuasted. I wanted to head home for a goodnight rest, yet I didn't. I was feeling very tired, but once I lay down on the mattress. I started to tear, and a thought came. "Estelle, give up, just give up, seriously, there's nothing in life to hold on, not even for your career." It tears me apart when you first said that. But I anticipated it already. I couldn't control my emotions, I had no one to turn to at that point of time. A thought came, do anything that makes you feel alright, I nearly took the knife and stab myself. Wake up, estelle. Reality, that's all. But I don't wanna face it. Hais. Livejournal back, http://thlovemachine.livejournal.com Wednesday, February 3, 2010 (Paiseh, Pictures are taken quiet awhile.) Was it because I owe you my life? Okay, forget about it. I'm trying to let go of you, girl. Haha! Okay, enough of crapz. Hmm, Copycat! I hate you, shitz you! Give jiaobin huh, NB! You bueysong, is it? Things I have, you wanna piece of it, or rather the full share? Fuck you. You seem innocent, AW. You ain't, sucker! Haha! Thanks alot to ShervelLim! (L) Had a great chat with her. Well, thanks to ShutiaoJieh! (L) for her $2! Loves(L) Went for the healthzone talk today, it was a TOTAL blast! Well, Had fun though, because of Aisha and the other girls, Haha! Not even done with a single SHIT of homework huh, Nice. I broke down just now, and I'm telling myself to hold on yet in my heart, I'm giving up. I think I'm slowly giving up. (Inner struggles) FML! Thanks, Potz for cheering me up, she's the best person you can find whenever you're upset, serious, I'm not lying through my teeth, (I'm not lying!) Okay, I guess this post is full of shit sentences. Random stuff for the day. P/s, I skipped a period of MotherTongue today! Yayness! P/s/s, I'm not done with my homework. P/s/s/s, I need to charge my MediaPlayer. P/s/s/s/s, I love ICE water! (Since young) P/s/s/s/s/s, I love M&M, so rainbow-ish! P/s/s/s/s/s/s, I hate that girl, don't make me turn it into hatred, I will kill myself. P/s/s/s/s/s/s/s, Listening to Blahblahblah. P/s/s/s/s/s/s/s/s, I'm so pissed off at you, girl. If I know it from the start, I wouldn't have know ya. I thought I could trust ya, but I've been hurt deeply. Sunday, January 31, 2010 Guess ain't feeling any better compare to yesterday. It went so drastic last night. I'm starting to lose myself, help me! Please. I'm losing the whole human race, help me, PLEASE. I guess I don't need the care from anyone. I don't deserve to be love, I don't deserve the priviledge of human being. I deserve to go HELL! I'm not happy pretending to be alright. Hatred builds up to killing. If you all get what I mean, DUDE! You can don't get what I mean though. Cycling does makes me go HIGH. I was cycling and screaming ALL the way, Nice.. Imagine cycling and going HIGH alone. Loner and Pathetic hor?! I know. Learning to get high ALONE. Okay, shall end here. Hmm, I'm stuck with UNTIL WE BLEED. Seem so eerie. And I realised all the tissues that I cried is in my bagpack. (Laughs, but true) Applause "Best" student of the year to Estelle Teh, ya right. Crapz, so many random stuff. Goodbyez!